Gooooaaaallllll. Oh wait. Not soccer. My bad. But, still: goals. Goals are important.
Without goals, The Wizard of Oz = Dorothy, Aunt Em, and Toto picking boogers out of their noses. Not fun. But add the goal: getting to the Land of Oz. /gasm
Goals are the first thing you have to define. What do you want to be? Have? Capabilities?
Construction worker: get rid of chronic back pain, get lean. New father: build muscle, strength train in a time efficient way, maybe even from home. First year college student: sleep around without getting STDs.
You know, the usual.
Goals are the guide.
But goals are absofuckinglutely childish. We should rename goals for what they really are: wants.
I want a bicycle. I just want a bicycle! Whatever, make me a bicycle, clown!
Even a five year old has goals. Wanting is easy. I want a lot of stuff.
I want one million dollars. An infinite supply of peanut butter. I want to drink the finest milk stouts in the world. To deadlift 600 pounds and move like a ghost cat.
I got lots of goals.
The problem with goals. They tell you where you want to go, but they don’t tell how to get there.
Goal are Pluto. Far away. Something you want reach in the future.I want to lose fat I want to build muscle I want to trick like Rasmus Ott I want to be as mobile as Hunter Cook I want to not be such a socially awkward nerd
Go ahead. List yours. You won’t. But it’s one of those things I’m supposed to tell you to do anyway.
Now bring things closer to home.
Jupiter: what behaviors do you need to adopt in order to (eventually) reach Pluto?
I want to lose fat, so the behaviors are…Drink no calorie beverages. Eat a rich source of protein at every feeding. Replace 50% of my starch intake with vegetables.
If you don’t know the behavioral root(s) of your goal, then you’re not in the Milky Way. (Buy Big Win Fat Loss. I like money.)
But, good news…
Even if you’re selecting bass ackwards out-of-this-galaxy behaviors, it doesn’t matter (for now).Eliminate all carbohydrates. Avoid fatty foods. Go jogging every day
(but it doesn’t matter)
Don’t forget via negativa when selecting behaviors.
I’ll eat more vegetables! I’ll train more! I’ll start eating this superfood! I’ll take this supplement!
Maybe you’re better off ~
I’ll stop eating the entire jar of peanut butter at night. I’ll stop drinking sodas all day. I’ll stop in the name of love before you break my heart.
Got your list? Didn’t think so. Just pretend. It’s cool. I’m not judging. (I’m so judging.)
I’m guessing your list is full of behaviors based on the RESULT(S) you expect them to yield.
Go to the gym “x” times per week and do “y” routine because this is the best way I know of to build muscle.
But here’s the deal…
This series is about Getting Shit Done, meaning you struggle Getting Shit Done. So you’ve either tried to adopt a behavior in the past and failed, or you haven’t even mustered the magic to start doing the behavior.
Go to the gym “x” times per week and do “y” routine might be the best way you know of to build muscle, but it doesn’t jive with your psyche. Else you wouldn’t struggle Getting Shit Done.
If you struggle Getting Shit Done, there’s (probably) pain, risk, or negative emotions associated with either (a) the act of doing whatever behavior[s] you need to do, or (b) the potential outcome[s] of said behavior[s].
“pain” “risk” “negative”
Could be actual physical pain. Like delayed onset muscle soreness (DOMS). But it doesn’t have to be.
Maybe it’s the time you have to invest in the behavior(s). Maybe it’s that the things you’re eliminating (beer, cake, chips, cookies) make you happy. Maybe it’s that you’re a newbie in the gym and you don’t know how to use the equipment, which is an awkward situation (unless you have Z2B).
Maybe it’s that you’re afraid of how your friends or spouse will perceive the changes you want to make, the fear of judgement and criticism.
These are all “pains.”
wel wel wel welllllcccommeeeeee to where it all starts. Behaviors you need to start doing, but can’t. You can’t not (double negatives yo) because you actually can’t, but, rather, because you’re choosing behaviors that are too far beyond your comfort zone.
Your software that programs for risk aversion. So when faced with(a) Easier, safer, comforting thing (b) Harder, risky, discomforting thing
it’s so much easier to pick (a). And sit on the couch. And watch TV. And eat cake, chips, and cookies. And corrode into comfort.
The behaviors you’re trying to adopt are akin to walking into a lion’s den. They’re risky and uncomfortable.
perception > reality
You can’t have any pain or punishment associated with a desired behavior you want to adopt. Well. Maybe you can. But it’ll be more difficult.
Closer to home. (again)
Break the behavior(s) down even more to reduce pain, risk, negative emotions associated with them.
Don’t select behaviors assuming you’re going to bring your A game to the table every single day. THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE. /skywalker